The kids and I go it alone......for 3 days!

Since becoming Kinleigh and Liam's mommy, I have realized that being their mommy is my one big insecurity (I am terrified that I will 'screw them up' in one or another). I question myself more then I need too and Stephen is always getting onto me and telling me that I am a wonderful mother and that they are lucky to have me as their mother. I am fully aware that they are well taken care of, spoiled rotten, happy, loved, my #1 priority, the loves of my life and my entire world, however, that does not stop the fact that I wonder if I am doing everything that I can to make sure they will turn out to be well adjusted, socially adept human beings! I look at my mommy friends and consider ALL of them super moms and wonder HOW in the world they do it. Up until this weekend, I had never really stopped to think about ALL that I do: going back to school, a mother to 2 wonderful children, a wife, a friend, a full time employee at a local bank and head of our household....whew, that is exhausting. Well, this weekend, I realized that I should be a little bit more confident in my mothering abilities and trust that what I am doing with and for Kinleigh and Liam is nothing but wonderful things. So with that being said, this weekend was my first confidence building experience, boy was it ever....

On Thursday morning (early), Stephen left for 3 days, to go to his graduate orientation at Auburn and well, left me with the kids ALL BY MYSELF.....uh oh. I was beyond nervous and terrified. I had about a million things running through my head, some of which included: How would I get all of us ready and out of the house by 7:30am without any help each morning? How will I get any rest when I am the only one getting up with Liam at night (unfortunately, he still does not sleep through the night)? Without any rest, how will I manage to function at work and then after work? Stephen assured me that I was 'super mom' and could do it (as he said this I would just shake my head and smile, knowing deep down that I was a nervous wreck). Well before he left, Kinleigh got sick and Liam started cutting his 2 teeth that he has been working on cutting for a while now (go figure all of that would happen), so that did not help with my confidence and thinking that 'I could do this,' but, I didn't have any other options, so I told myself, 'I think I can, I think I can.' So Thursday morning came, Stephen left and we all got up. Thursday was okay cause well I was at home with Kinleigh since she had a fever and could not go to school, so I tried to sleep and get some hw done, which was a success!! Friday, everyone went where they needed to go and everyone felt fine (I was tired from little man waking up twice wednesday night and twice thursday night, but I had to keep on trucking). Not only did everyone get to their respective places, but we got there MORE then on time. We left the house Friday at 7:15am and I was at work at 7:50am (that has NOT happened at all since I had Liam)! Everyone had a great day and Friday night was productive and happy!! Saturday, we got up, got ready and out of the house only 15 minutes late to leave for one my very good friends house! Everyone was in a fantastic mood (aside from my exhaustion) and we had a wonderful visit with her and her girls (she is a 'supermom' x 1000). I was starting to lose some of my insecurities and feel pretty good about things as far as being alone with the kids and knowing that they will survive, if left in my hands! Then, saturday afternoon came around.......the kids would not nap, I had a headache, my stomach hurt really bad, Kinleigh was extra whiny, Liam would not stop crying and neither one of them would let me just relax and rest.....OF COURSE! For about 10 minutes I wanted to have a meltdown (which Im sure was just the exhaustion/migraine controlling my thoughts), but then I realized that everything would be fine, the kids would go to sleep, I would get quiet time and daddy would come home (yipee!!). All of that happened and all was good in my world again. 

Needless to say, that after this weekend, I realized just how amazing my children are, how blessed I am to have them, how much they have taught me about myself and the world, that I really am capable of more than I give myself credit for, that so far-I have not 'screwed them up,' that I really do take on too much (but that has been an ongoing problem since elementary school) and most importantly, that daddy helps out ALOT and we are very lucky to have him in our lives and need him to not go away again!!! :)