RESPECT

So Kinleigh has really reached the stage at which she is understanding the concept of 'respect.' This has been a recurring theme at Montessori. Respect ones personal belongings, respect others when they are speaking, respect ones space, respect in general (please, thank you, yes ma'am, no ma'am etc.), respect what mommy, daddy, nani (my mom, who is a constant figure in their lives) and anyone else says, respect her teachers, respect her friends at school and so on and so on. So with this stage upon us, it has made me VERY conscious of this term, 'Respect.' We are trying to teach her right from wrong, what she can and cannot do, who she needs to listen to, who she needs to not listen (strangers basically) and so on. It has got me thinking about Respect for any and everyone. This is what I have come up with for the term and it has made me realized that I allow some people to GREATLY disrespect my entire family as a whole and myself individually, without even realizing it.

RESPECT:
*It is earned, not expected.
*Be aware of an appointment that you have made with someone and BE ON TIME, not doing so is very disrespectful and you are basically telling that person, I really don't care about you.
*Just because you are older then me, does not mean that I should/have to respect you, age is just a # and all it means is that you were born before I was.
*DO NOT tell me how to raise our children, they are our children, God gave them to us and entrusted them with us. You telling us how to raise is you saying, 'I don't trust you with them and you are incapable.' (say that to my face instead and see what happens).
*Not everyone deserves to be called ma'am or sir. Especially if you are rude, intolerable of my children (simply because they are children and apparently when you were born, you were born at the age of 50) or lack self-awarence.
*Just because we are family, does not mean that I HAVE to or even should respect you.
*Respect is a two way street, don't expect anything different from us
*Is returning a phone call, email, text message in a timely manner (whether it is an emergency or not); I contacted you for a reason and if I left a message, I deserve the gesture returned, at the most.
*Is being understanding of last minute cancellations and not flying off the handle, I have kids and a family, they come first, END OF DISCUSSION.
*Not talking about someone behind their back. Give them the decency to defend themselves; you are obviously thinking about them to be talking about them, let them know, to their face, instead of someone else's.
*Is acknowledging when there is a problem and handling it, instead of acting like nothing is wrong and trying to go on with your business.
*Is admitting when you are legitimately wrong to someone else and apologizing with MEANING. This one is one of my biggest pet peeves, I have noticed, in older generations especially, that they have the HARDEST time admitting fault and then apologizing for it. My perception of this lack of action is that they assume that us 'younger generations' aren't capable of being the one that is right and that because they are older (again with the age thing), they know more. If you have done something wrong, legitimately so and you are incapable of apologizing or even acknowledging what you did, do not expect me to respect you as a person. I cannot and I will not, no matter who you are to me.
*Honoring someone's requests/wishes whether you want to or not or agree with them.
And lastly, this is the biggest one, I think......
*Is something you have to have for yourself first, before you can give it to someone else. If you cannot respect yourself, how in the world do you even know how to respect someone else or somebody else to take it as truth.

Having children has taught me a TON, some good, some bad. They are a very strong eye opening element in my life, among other things. It has made me realize and come to terms with some things/people that I might not have otherwise. With that being said, I want my children to be respectful, independent, confident, self aware, intelligent people from now until forever. That starts with Stephen and I, that starts with our example, the way we handle obstacles in our path, the way we deal with others and with them. I want them to have confidence and feel comfortable in their skin. I was none of these things growing up and I REFUSE to allow that to happen to my kids because of a lack of Respect within themselves and from others.
So with all that being said, if you have in ANY way disrespected myself, my kids, my husband or family in general........be prepared, I am mama, hear me roar! LOL
No in all seriousness, this is a concept that we are taught from as young as we can possibly pick up on the concept and I am just dumbfounded as to why SO many people do not fully grasp this concept (older and younger then myself)?

As Aretha Franklin said, 'R.E.S.P.E.C.T. find out what it means to me.' What does it mean to you? 

P.S. This is NOT a rant of any kind, this is just something that I have noticed in the past few weeks and have been taking great mental notes on!! I realize that this post will not change the world, but, maybe with my realization of these things, I can change some things in myself, the way we raise our children, the way that we allow others to treat us and the way we treat others.